cliteracy in islam

Sex has existed since the beginning of mankind. It is through it that we derive not just pleasure, but reproduction. It is so much of a primary exercise that without it, there would be an end to life itself. Imagine what will happen to the continuity of life if every one stops having sex; well, maybe artificial insemination can replace sex in that respect. Maybe!

So what is Sex in fact? Is sex in Islam just about reproduction, or does it include pleasure, and if it includes pleasure what are the ways we can derive this pleasure without going out of the teachings of Islam?

It is sad that when we talk about Sex in this age of ours, we only think of penetration. We don’t associate or assume that the Clitoris is a part and parcel of the female sex organ. While in fact, if Sex is to give pleasure to both parties, which it is, the Clitoris has to be fairly and justly given its due.

Cliteracy, therefore, is about enlightening people on the importance of the clitoris with respect to sex, and pleasure generally. Cliteracy has to be taught and imbibed. Things have to change. It is alarming that one out of every three women do not, and in most cases cannot reach orgasm through penetration alone. 80% of women have also been found to have difficulty reaching orgasm through penetration alone. Clitoral stimulation during intercourse can help, except if the person has the medical condition called Female Sexual Dysfunction (FSD).

So where does this take us? If the pleasure of both parties in a sexual intercourse is primary, then we have to give the clitoris the right it deserves. We must give it as much pleasure as the phallus gets. We must be Just! We must stand firmly for justice every time as the Quran stated in Suratul Nisa verse 135 that ‘oh you who believe, stand firmly for justice…’

First of all, let’s look into sex in Islam, and the good associated with doing it right and well. In doing this, we will have to explore the primary sources of Islamic Law, which are the Quran, and the Sunnah (Hadith). Let’s start with what the Quran says about Sex.

Quran 2 verse 187 states that ‘it has been made permissible for you the night preceding fasting to go to your wives [for sexual relations]’. Quran 2 verse 222 states that “and they ask you about menstruation. Say, ‘It is harm, so keep away from wives during menstruation. And do not approach them until they are pure. And when they have purified themselves, then come to them from where Allah has ordained for you. Indeed, Allah loves those who are constantly repentant and loves those who purify themselves.’”

Quran 2 verse 223 was more graphic about it when it stated that ‘your wives are a tilth for you, so go to your tilth (have sexual relations with your wives in any manner as long as it is in the vagina and not in the anus), when or how you will, and send (good deeds, or ask Allah to bestow upon you pious offspring) for your own selves beforehand. And fear Allah, and know that you are to meet Him (in the Hereafter), and give good tidings to the believers’.

The Prophet once said that ‘Allah is not shy to tell you the truth: do not have intercourse with your wives in the anus’. Narrated by Ahmad, 5/213

From the three verses above, we learned that Sex is permissible for us with our spouses. We also learned that there are times we must not have sex, and we also learned about how not to have sex. That said, let’s look into what the Hadith has to say about Sex.

Hudhaifa and Abu Shaiba reported Allah’s Messenger (SAW) as saying: Every act of goodness is Sadaqa (Charity). – Muslim 2197.

Abu Dharr reported: some of the people from among the Companions of the Prophet of Allah (SAW) said to him: Messenger of Allah, the rich have taken away all the reward. They observe prayer as we do; they keep the fasts as we keep, and they give Sadaqa out of their surplus riches. Upon this he (the Prophet) said: Has Allah not prescribed for you (a course) by following which you can (also) do sadaqa? In every declaration of the glorification of Allah (i. e. saying Subhan Allah) there is a Sadaqa, and every Takbir (i. e. saying Allahu-Akbar) is a sadaqa, and every praise of His (saying al-Hamdu Lillah) is a Sadaqa and every declaration that He is One (La illha ill-Allah) is a sadaqa, and enjoining of good is a sadaqa, and forbidding of that which is evil is a Sadaqa, and in man’s sexual Intercourse (with his wife), there is a Sadaqa. They (the Companions) said: Messenger of Allah, is there reward for him who satisfies his sexual passion among us? He said: Tell me, if he were to devote it to something forbidden, would it not be a sin on his part? Similarly, if he were to devote it to something lawful, he should have a reward. (Muslim 2198)

In another hadith, Umar Ibn Al-Khattab (May Allah be pleased with him) came one day to the Prophet and said, “O Messenger of Allah, I am ruined!” “What has ruined you?” asked the Prophet. He replied, “Last night I turned my wife over,” meaning that he had had vaginal intercourse with her from the back. The Prophet (peace and blessings be upon him) did not say anything to him until the verse cited above was revealed. Then he told him, “[Make love with your wife] from the front or the back, but avoid the anus and intercourse during menstruation.” (Reported by Ahmad and At-Tirmidhi)

From the three Hadith above, we learned that Sex is permissible for us with our spouses. We also learned that having lawful sexual intercourse can be an act of worship, and we also learned about how not to have sex.

If Sex is permissible in Islam, then why is the Clitoris ignored? Is stimulating the clitoris not part of sex? You see, over the years, women have been known to be shy about these things. They would rather not climax than tell their spouses how they want it. And some women just don’t know their body well, talkless of educating their spouses. Thus, men, and women alike, have to be educated in the affairs of cliteracy. Men especially, have to know that Sex is not about them alone. It involves more than just them, and it should be so treated.

Having known the position of Sex in Islam, it beholds that we learn how it is done. Sex in Islam is not just for procreation, it is also a means of pleasure for both parties as portrayed above. And the better the parties feel, the more the rewards that will be recorded for them, just like every other good deeds.

For instance, Allah (SWT) says “whoever brings a good deed shall have ten times the like thereof” (Surah al-Anaam: 160) and the Prophet (SAW) once said ‘Every good deed that a human performs is multiplied ten times up to seven hundred’. (Bukhari and Muslim)

So for every iota of sexual pleasure each party endeavors to lawfully give the other, the more records of good deeds the person will have. How much more if one is able to get their spouse to climax, every time? The reward will be endless.

This takes us straight to the cliteracy question of this piece. So if for instance, a husband only cares about satisfying himself and not his wife, he most likely won’t get enough good deeds recorded for him. But if he is able to understand the sexual urge of his spouse, and satisfies it, he will definitely get huge rewards. So this is not just about pleasure, it’s about worship too.

The clitoris is major to climax, as I have mentioned above, and stimulating before, during or after sex will not only pleasure one’s spouse, but will be recorded as acts of worship if one carries it out in lawful circumstances. With rafath: foreplay in the Quran, I was able to highlight an instance where foreplay was mentioned in the Quran, and in that piece, and in subsequent ones, I’ll be discussing more of such verses in the Quran.

Pending the time you read that piece, here are a handful of hadith recorded in volume 14 of Wasa’il Shia in pages 40 and 82, that is related to sex and foreplay. As much as I don’t know how authentic these Wasa-il Shia hadith are, it is worthy of note. For example, in page 40, Imam Ali was recorded to have said that ‘when you intend to have sex with your wife, do not rush because the woman (also) has needs (which should be fulfilled)’. Also in page 40, Sex without foreplay has been equated to cruelty. The Prophet (SAW) said, “Three people are cruel …a person who has sex with his wife before foreplay.”

In page 82, another hadith equates sex without foreplay to animal behavior: “When anyone of you has sex with his wife, then he should not go to her like birds; instead he should be slow and delaying.” And in more specific terms, ‘there should be mutual foreplay between them because it is better for sex.”

These sayings clearly shows that the husband and the wife should feel completely free when they are engaged in mutual stimulation which is known as foreplay. And foreplay doesn’t have to be a rigid affair, it is different with every body and even with every circumstance. What might constitute foreplay today, might not necessarily constitute it tomorrow; one has to keep working at it like every other act of worship. There is nothing wrong, according to Islam, for a woman to be active and responsive during sex. The operative words are mutual pleasure and satisfaction.

We should be careful not to treat the clitoris as just a thing that comes before sex, and not as sex itself. The harm in treating it as a thing that comes before the main event is that it will be whisked through, and not be stimulated well enough. At best, it will be a part of it. So as much as one stimulates it at the foreplay session, one can also learn to stimulate it even when one is now in the penetration phase. The clitoris deserves as much right and time as the male’s sexual organ, because as we will see later in this piece, it is integral to orgasm for women.

Now that we’ve been able to establish that lawful sexual intercourse, apart from being a thing of pleasure for the parties involved, it is also an act of worship. We’ve also been able to establish where and when to or not to have sex. We’ve also been able to establish that the clitoris, like the phallus, is a sexual organ that ought to be stimulated whether before, during or after sex. As we have also been able to establish that foreplay is an essential practise.

Contrary to popular belief, women do not actually take longer to orgasm than men, and that is only true if one knows what one is doing. Studies have shown that women and men reach orgasm within the same time frame if the woman’s clitoris is well stimulated.

Let’s go into details on the Cliteracy issue. In 1998, Australian urologist Helen O’Connell published a paper in the Journal of Urology describing the sheer scope and size of the clitoris. She wrote that the un-erect clitoris, most of which is not visible, could be up to 9 centimetres long — longer, as some have described it, than an un-erect penis.

The external part of the clitoris that we see is actually referred to as the glans. This part of the clitoris has over 8,000 nerve endings on it — twice as many as that of the average penis. The 8,000 nerve endings on the glans communicate with and connect to a network of 15,000 more that service the entire pelvic region. This means that, contrary to Sigmund Freud’s theory that clitoral orgasms are inferior to their vaginal counterparts — technically all orgasms are clitoral, even ‘vaginal’ ones. A woman’s ability to orgasm (and its intensity) has nothing to do with the shape, size, or color of her clitoris.

Most (about three-fourths) of the clitoris is hidden from sight; the majority of it is actually internal, and connected to the glans by an internal shaft known as the corpus cavernosum of the clitoris. The corpora cavernosum is made up of a pair of spongy erectile tissue structures that, when erect, wrap around and squeezes on the sides of the vagina like they’re giving it a hug.

From there, the corpora cavernosum extends further and branches off into two wings known as the crura, creating a wishbone-like structure. When stimulated, these “wings” fill with blood and go from pointing towards the hips to stretching straight back towards the spine.

Underneath the crura on either side of the vaginal opening are the clitoral vestibules, also known as the vestibular bulbs. These sac-like erectile tissue structures lie internally just beneath the labia majora. Like the corpora cavernosa, they too become engorged with blood during arousal; this cuffs the vaginal opening, increases tightness, and pushes the vulva outward. The blood becomes trapped, causing erection of the clitoris. Upon orgasm the blood is released into the circulatory system by orgasmic spasms.

The clitoris is the only human organ that exists solely for pleasure (unlike the penis, which has a reproductive purpose). The clitoris is made up of erectile tissue that becomes erect during sexual stimulation and relaxed after orgasm. 50-75% of women reach the big “O” through clitoral stimulation, with or without the addition of vaginal intercourse.

Not only does the clitoris never deteriorate, but it actually gets bigger with age! At the end of puberty, a girl’s clitoris has nearly doubled in size. By the time a woman is 32 years old, her clitoris is almost four times larger than it was at puberty. And it just keeps growing. After menopause, the clitoris is about seven times larger than it was at birth! The clitoris is much larger than you think!

All in all, I hope we have seen that the clitoris is not just a ‘bean’ as some refer to it. But a primary sexual organ that must be well appraised. Hence, stimulating it is definitely an art we have to perfect.

This brings to light the issue of Female Genital Mutilation. It is worthy of note that Islam does not in anyway mandate that the female genital be mutilated. Male circumcision is a different story. It is definitely a sunnah (although not compulsory, fardh) and it takes after the covenant of Prophet Ibrahim (Prophet Abraham). It is clearly meant for males only and scriptural reference to it is the Torah, none in the Quran, but of course, it is in the teaching of Prophet Muhammad (SAW). The Torah says, “And Abraham took Ishmael, his son, and all that were born at his house, and all that were bought with his money, every male among the men of Abraham’s house and circumcised the flesh of their foreskin. In the self – same day as God had said unto him” Genesis 17:23, see also Genesis 17: 9 to 14, and 23 to 27.

The fact that Christians (unlike Jews and Muslims) ceased to circumcise their boys, was not a decree of Christianity proclaimed by Jesus (AS). It was Paul who later exempted Christians from circumcision and permitted them to eat pig’s meat. Jesus was circumcised and he did not eat pig’s meat. Now that that is out of the way, let’s look deeply into Female Circumcision.

As I have written above, female circumcision Is NOT required in Islam.

Dr Hassan Hathout, a gynaecologist, a Board Member of the Minaret, a bi-monthly magazine published by the Islamic Centre of Southern California summarized this point below:

1. Female circumcision is a habit practised long before Islam. Its map of distribution does not coincide with the Islamic map, and includes parts of Russia, some Asian (including some Arab) tribes, parts of South America and the Nile valley (Egypt, Sudan and Ethiopia). Female circumcision is still being practised by both Non-Muslims and Muslims in these countries. However, at present in Egypt and Sudan only Muslims practise it, (a minority in Egypt and more in Sudan).

2. Female circumcision is not an Islamic requirement. There is a hadith that says that “circumcision is sunnah (obligatory) for men and charity (good deeds) for women”, but various sources do not consider it authentic. In another hadith, the Prophet pbuh instructed Omm Atiya, a woman practitioner of circumcision, “Take the minimum, Omm Atiya, and don’t exceed it, for this would be more pleasurable for the husband and protective of chastity by satisfying the wife’s desire” (narrated by Ibn Majjah). This is taken to refer exclusively to the tribes of that time who would insist on the procedure, since Islam did not recommend or forbid female circumcision (same stand in Christianity and Judaism: both knew it).

3. Female circumcision is not practised in Islamic countries other than Egypt and Sudan and possibly exists in few others. Women of Mecca, Medina, Najd, the Persian Gulf, Iran, North Africa, Turkey, Pakistan, Syria, Lebanon, Palestine, etc are not circumcised. This is an established fact, as well as first hand knowledge – I am a gynaecologist and I have dealt with all those nationalities.

4. Female circumcision does not diminish sexual desire, for this depends mainly on psycho-hormonal factors. All circumcision does is to make the woman less able to get satisfaction, and this is certainly a frequent cause of marital disharmony and problems. The major factor of chastity before marriage and fidelity within it remains to be the conscience and proper Islamic upbringing. There is no evidence whatsoever that moral standards in Islamic countries that do not have circumcision are lower than in Islamic countries that have it.

5. In view of this, it seems that there is no Islamic basis of making circumcision a requirement for women/Muslim converts or, for that matter, non-converts.

Regarding the question on circumcision versus female genital mutilation: they are technically one and the same. The degree is quite variable. In its most minor form it is trimming of labia minora. A higher degree is to add amputating part of the clitoris. The severest form, the one still practised in Sudan and called “infibulation”, is the wide removal of both labia minora and clitoris and sticking both sides together leaving only a small opening for the egress of urine and menstruation, and the entry of the penis at intercourse (sometimes against great difficulty necessitating surgery).

Medical complications are possible, including haemorrhage, sepsis, scarring, difficulty at childbirth which has to be tackled surgically, apart from the psychological aftermath.

In conclusion, cliteracy is not only part of Islam, it is essential in receiving good rewards. It has been likened to giving alms. And one will be rewarded for lawfully practicing it.

The cliteracy in islam conversation continues here with rafath: foreplay in the Quran.